Bad Movies & Beer

Episode 57 - Dude, Where’s My Car? (2000)

The guys are taking a trip down memory lane this week with the unforgettable 2000 comedy DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR?

Despite being firmly in the target audience for this movie, Nolan somehow never saw it as a teenager - putting his grumpy woke Dad vibes in direct conflict with Cooper's 90s nostalgia. Maybe that's why they spend most of this episode alternating between laughing like stoners and arguing like old men.  

Still, it's a fun 4/20 adventure that (much like a movie that features blind kids, strippers, ostriches, a space cult, and Andy Dick in a cage) goes off the rails at points but (maybe?) makes sense in the end.

You'll have to hear it to believe it, but we should warn you: This mysterious and powerful episode features a beer from SweetWater Brewing Company, and it's mystery is only exceeded by its power!

Episode 56 - Coffy (1973)

Cooper and Nolan are pouring themselves a hot cup of 70s action this week with the blaxploitation classic COFFY!

Legendary actress Pam Grier is on a one-woman quest for justice, and the guys are on a two-man quest to try to make sense of the gritty world of pimps, pushers, & prostitutes. Apparently it's a world of individual theme songs, gratuitous use of dummies, and horrible attempts at accents, with just enough social commentary sprinkled in to make this somehow not feel totally ridiculous (although there ARE a lot of shirt rips).

What IS ridiculous is Cooper's ongoing obsession with making Nolan seem like a perv, and let's just say that thanks to Pam Grier's ample... ahem... talents, there's lots of opportunities for that. So enjoy yourself, but be careful; the amount of fun in this episode (featuring a beer from Tomorrow Brew Co.) might just keep you up all night.

Episode 55 - Heart Condition (1990)

Is recommending that your client join a movie where a racist cop gets haunted by the ghost of his Black arch enemy (after first receiving that arch enemy's heart via transplant) enough to get a Hollywood agent fired? You can hear the answer this week when Cooper and Nolan review what is quite possibly Denzel Washington's worst movie ever - HEART CONDITION.

In all seriousness, there's so much that goes wrong with this alleged comedy that it would be impossible to put the blame on one person, but that won't stop the guys from taking their best shot. From the screenwriter (whose sense of humor is what REALLY needed a transplant), to the director, to whoever was in charge of picking out the music, it's one bad decision after another.

There IS plenty to laugh about though, from Nolan's theory that both The Sixth Sense AND Point Break stole from this movie, to Cooper's thoughts on whether it's possible to perform sexually with the ghost of your lover's ex watching.

Is it enough to give this movie a new lease on life? Absolutely not, but this episode (featuring not one but TWO beers from Bell's Brewery) is definitely one you'll want to hear before it's too late.

Episode 54 - Showgirls (1995)

After three failed attempts, Cooper and Nolan are FINALLY taking a look at one of the most legendary bad movies of all time - SHOWGIRLS!

It's Elizabeth Berkley like you've never seen her before - unsuccessfully trying to act angry. She's also flashing a LOT of skin as she awkwardly dances her way through what is either a brilliant satire of "Star is Born" movies or an genuine attempt that went horribly wrong.

The guys might not know which it is, but they DO know one thing... the James character did NOT need to be in this movie.

That's just one of the many things getting exposed in this one, so leave your inhibitions at the door; what happens in this episode (featuring a beer from New Ontario Brewing Co.), STAYS in this episode.

Episode 53 - Theater of Blood (1973)

Cooper and Nolan are raising the curtain on some 70s horror this week with THEATER OF BLOOD!

In this low-budget bit of British cinema, horror icon Vincent Price gets to live out every actor's dream by murdering his critics. But could that ever actually happen? Let's just say the guys might be reconsidering some of the things they've said in past episodes.

That's because once you've seen the lengths a man will go to for revenge - amateur surgery, trampoline swordfights, death by train - anything seems possible.

So get ready for the performance of a lifetime; this episode (featuring a beer from Overflow Brewing Company) might just leave you rolling in the aisles.

Episode 52 - The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (2009)

The guys are getting their Irish on this week with THE BOONDOCK SAINTS II: ALL SAINTS DAY, the "Wait, when did they make that?" sequel to legendary cult favorite The Boondock Saints.

For Cooper it's a paint-by-numbers action movie with characters who have NOT aged well, but for Nolan (who was told he was Irish for the first 36 years of his life) it's an emotional journey through the very fabric of his identity.

There's also bad jokes, bad accents, and all kinds of bad decisions, which can only mean one thing - the MacManus boys are back!

Get ready to bro out; this episode (featuring a truly inspired beer connection from Beyond The Pale Brewing Company) puts the "Saint" in St. Patrick's Day!

Episode 51 - The Karate Kid Part II (1986)

Cooper and Nolan are back from their mid-season break, and thanks to a very special audience request they're waxing on (and off) about THE KARATE KID PART II - aka The Karate Kid, but in Japan this time.

Much like the movie's producers, the guys are running back enjoyable bits from earlier installments, such as:

- Who's the real hero of this movie?

- Everyone loves Elizabeth Shue

- Is that guy actually (insert cultural background here)?

...plus their usual assortment of d**k jokes and nonsense.

So get ready to experience the Glory of Love; this episode (featuring a collaboration between Sawdust City Brewing Co. and Indie Alehouse) is sure to drum up some excitement!

BONUS Episode - Let My Puppets Come (1976)

In this very special BONUS EPISODE, Cooper and Nolan try desperately to hang in there as they discuss LET MY PUPPETS COME, a movie that can best be summed up by the phrase "Puppets make a porno".

This bizarre piece of 70s underground cinema (released on Blu Ray from the fine folks at Vinegar Syndrome) was Nolan's birthday present back in their October gift exchange, and it's a ridiculous, absurd, totally offensive piece of shock comedy that features just about every puppet sex act you could think of - and some that you probably couldn't.

Seriously, words can't even describe some of the things that happen in this movie, so the guys have their work cut out for them, but at least thanks to Great Lakes Brewery Nolan didn't have to try too hard to find a beer for this episode.

So if you're brave enough, get ready to get weird; Valentine's Day may be over but there's still plenty of love (or something) waiting for you in this one!

Episode 50 - Top Gun (1986)

Cooper and Nolan are taking a ride into the danger zone this week with Tom Cruise's 80s classic TOP GUN!

It's another controversial choice for this podcast - one that began as a desire to find a BIG movie for the 50th episode, and one that ends with Cooper offering to let the estate of director Tony Scott kick him in the balls.

Along the way the guys argue over topics like whether there's more to the Maverick/Iceman relationship than meets the eye, if Kelly McGillis was the right choice for the role of Charlie, and the possibility that this whole thing is just propaganda to get people to join the Navy.

Just like playing beach volleyball in jeans, things heat up quickly in this one, so prepare for takeoff; this episode (featuring a beer from Barnstormer Brewing & Distilling Co.) will definitely test the rules of engagement!

Episode 49 - Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987)

One year after tackling the original, a very drunk Cooper and Nolan are keeping their Christmas promise by covering SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT PART 2!

Since the first movie did a perfect job of setting up a sequel, the guys went in with high expectations. And thanks to the 12 Beers of Christmas from Whitewater Brewing Company, they also went in with extremely high blood alcohol levels.

The results were a lot like the grown up version of main character Ricky - an angry, sloppy mess. After the longest beer talk in the history of this podcast, the guys weigh in on topics like movie theatre etiquette, acceptable explosion sizes, and how much recycled footage is too much. Not to mention their attempt to figure out what Nolan hates more - the Catholic Church or guys named Chip.

It's a wild ride, so grab a beer (or 12) and strap yourself in; much like Christmas, an episode like this only comes once a year!